Emptiness

I feel kinda empty right now. I'm lost at sea, floating around trying to find something to tie myself to. There is a rock, but to tie myself to this rock I need help. There are people on the rock, and they smile, wave, seem nice enough. But, they won't tie me to the rock. So I keep floating around. Other rocks appear, but if I tie myself to these they will either drag me down, or keep me away from the rock where I should be. I know I should be on that other rock, because it is calling me. I can hear it clearly, telling me I must come, that tied to this rock I can do that which should be doing. Every day spent away from this rock is one less day to do what I should be doing. But I need permission to tie myself down, and the seemingly nice people won't do it for me.

So, I feel empty. Lost and abandoned. I could petition them, make them hear me, become an issue that just *has* to be dealt with. But if I do that, even though I will be tied to the rock I should be on, I feel I will be resented for it.

There is a light, far away. A strong light, appealing, something to look at, away from the dark lonely sea. Maybe in that part of the as yet unexplored sea, I will find an even better rock to be on. Maybe. The light is good, but what if it misleads me, and takes me even further away from the rock that I should be on now? I am tempted all the same. I will find something there, but will it be enough. If it is not, it may not be possible to come back.

There is nothing more that I should be doing other than being on that rock. Until I get there, I will always feel empty.